Right now I feel so helpless, so weak, so unprepared.  I am fearing what is in store for me right now. Not really the actual surgery although that is a concern, luckily God has given me a peace about the actual surgery which was my original fear.

I fear everything that surrounds that surgery though. The IV, being put to sleep, and waking up. I fear getting home, and I really fear the pain. But above all I fear the rehabilitation.

I’m nervous about the pain… and not being able to push myself. I’m worried because I’m not very healthy, or active I will have a very hard time coping with it. I have so many fears right now. I’m aching for peace.

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